Malc - Borat's Version Is A Cover...The Original Was Written By Sweaty Thighs Samantha & Performed By Ample Andy's Anti Semites

Hey Malc,

That Borat is a phunny mutha plucker but he ripped off Samantha. 

Sam, Andy and his band were all from Turlock. Tragically, they all met their demise under bizarre circumstances. Well, maybe not so bizarre if you're from Turlock. Sweaty Thighs Samantha, was knockin back tequila shots one hot August night in the late sixties, at The Log Cabin Saloon. Needless to say, as Sam was knockin em back, her thighs were sweating, she was mumbling something about the Rothschild's Banking Interests, when a red hot mesquite coal exploded in the Bar-B-Q- pit and landed on Sam's crotch.

Sam and her typically clammy thighs ignited due to the extreme concentration of alcohol on her characteristically sweaty thighs. Sam began  flaming, snapping and popping like a bushel load of pork rinds, floating in a deep fat fryer. By the time the Turlock Rural Fire Department arrived, Sam was a smoldering clump of charred flesh. All but her pretty little head, that is!

The fireman might of been able to save Sam but they were distracted from their task by the strangest thing. Sam was plaintively singing her last song.  Yeah' - you guessed it - "Throw The Jew Down The Well".

 Andy and his Anti Semites were inconsolably grief stricken at the news of Sam's demise. They decided to indulge in one of the few undertakings that could assuage their grief. They went bear hunting at their favorite high sierra bear hunting grounds, a few miles above Kennedy Meadows.

The boys got their bear and Andy did the honors of grilling the beast up for dinner that night. Unfortunately, Andy's fire wasn't hot enough and the entire band except Andy, died swift but agonizing deaths, as trichinosis worms ate their brains.

Andy lived the longest.  Lucky for Andy, before the worms got to his brain, one night after his usual skinny dip in the river, he had a yearning to play his steel slide guitar.  Andy sat down dripping wet on his favorite bucket. He put what he believed was his steel guitar across his lap and began a tribute rendition of Sam and Andy's song, "I got tears in my ears from lying on my back and cryin over you". 

However, on this occasion Andy began crying before he began playing. With his senses dulled, his vision impaired and his mental state, shall we say- less than healthy, Andy mistook his portable, supercharged, brush shredder, for his steel guitar. Andy stood up to tune what he thought was his instrument and got his Johnson caught in the shredder.

The rest is simply to gruesome to recount and cherished Turlock history. 

And so it goes, as Anna Rosanna Danna's Uncle used to say, "If it's not one thing it's another."

The moral of the story is - You can call me Ray or you can call me Jay or you can call me R.J - but ya' don't let your Johnson near a brush shredder when your beklemmt! You would be mashugana, if you did!

Peace Out!

Bnic

PS: Now everybody - one more time for Sam & Andy...  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vb3IMTJjzfo&feature=player_embedded